Jr's Sandwich Shop

My brother and I eat lunch together a couple times a week. Yesterday we thought it would be fun to see where our GPS took us for lunch. We ended up at a place called, Jr's Sandwich Shop, right off of Phillips. When we pulled up it was next to a pay by the hour hotel. The hotel attendant gave us the stink eye as we parked the car. Staying true to our pledge, we entered Jr's restaurant. When we walked into this place, it had forty ounce beverages, dish-washing detergent, and other misc. items in their glass fridge. The cook/waitress was surprised to see us, as we were the only people in the resturant for the entire hour. As we sat down, the napkin holder was a billboard for HIV awareness, complete with pamphlets on sexual abstinence. It didn't exactly create an atmosphere for a fun lunch. I found myself analyzing my life choices. This waitress was a hard worker, and she really proud of the food she made us. To be honest, it wasn't that great, but I admired her strength. It cant be easy, or safe to work where she does. She is a bit of hope to a dark area of town. I forget how rough most peoples lives are when I'm absorbed with whats going on with me. Jr's shop was a little reminder of what real struggle is. I couldn't help, but think of at least ten issues people right around us were dealing with when I sat down to eat. Right out of the window you can watch drug deals, prostitution, poverty, alcoholism, and HIV destroy this stretch of space. Then, I couldn't help but think of the solution. Only God can restore our city. I know him, and he has restored my life. What does that mean?

2218 park

If you didn't know, I've been living in a house with a bunch of people. They are really inspiring people. One is a writer, one is a student, a couple is a graphic/artist duo, and you have me sprinkled in there. Its was a big step of faith for us all, but it has been a good choice. The best part of it has been the lows. Our relational challenges have drawn us closer to God and each other. It has been really cool. There has been a few low points, but at the end of it, God brought us through. Recently one of the roommates scored a new job. The lows can be more extreme, but the highs are even higher. We celebrated yesterday like I got the job. I feel like I did, almost. Thats what it looks like to live a life together. I don't think you have to move in together to experience that. It may just happen a little quicker. Monday night we all made fun of the bachelor for an hour. That show is 10x funnier with a group of witty people. At any rate, its been so much fun. We always have something going down, or people stopping by. Last night I randomly ran into a friend at Publix that I have been trying to connect with. He stopped by for dinner in our backyard and met all of our friends. My hope is that our house becomes a safe place for everyone to just feel at home. I Sometimes feel like I'm in on this big secret that people just aren't aware of.

Reflections on the saddle

I don't know about you, but I identify with people who in the Bible who are cowards. I most of the time will try my hardest to appear that I'm fearless, but don't be fooled. I'm scared shitless. I've recently started to teach and lead again in our career ministry in Jacksonville. As I've been teaching I've never remembered having to be confronted with so much fear.I will admit that I'm not the best orator in the world. I have a hard time holding conversations most of the time. Often I wonder, why do I sign up to do something I'm not naturally good at? This past week was amazing for me because I was sub-par, and the Holy Spirit still showed up and people had encounters with God. As a group we are on a process of following Jesus I am included. It's amazing to see God helping me have right perspective and trust in his leading and move when I'm obedient. The pressure is slowly coming off me as I trust him more. I'm on the same Journey.

Baptism of Jesus

Waiting is a hard thing to do. The middle is never fun, but doing nothing can be just as faithful. I always want go, it feels good. Part of this is good. This is the way God made us. When heaven was perfect on earth, God gave Adam a job to do. He gave Adam something to accomplish because through this we worship God and experience his pleasure. He also, gave Adam a wife. Both of these can be jacked up when they are out of order. The waiting period is always revealing. God brews up all our mixed motives and its a great/brutal process where God uses our incontentment to make us aware of the hurting places he wants to heal.

Anyways, yesterday I was reading the story of Jesus's baptism, which must have been an amazing thing to witness. God rips open heaven, a dove flies out of it and God speaks to the world that this is his loved son in whom he is well please. This has always been a commissioning chapter in the Bible for me. I've always said yes, now hes going to lay the law down and shake the whole world up. As I read it again this week I was reminded of how God calls him a son before he does a thing. Wow!!! God is pleased with him just because of his relationship. For most of us thats the hardest thing to believe. Everyone of our other relationships seem to be opposite than this.

Jesus just lives out of this reality. He loves his father and just responds to his spirit over and over again. This week I was reminded while Jesus was God he was limited as a human. Even though he was fully human, God's spirit was what made him powerful. He just responded when God was moving like anyone of us can. It was a bit of a commissioning for me this week. As I'm taking steps out in faith again God lovingly told me that he is with me and he will do the "work." I'm a son, and he is the king. His burden is light and his yoke is easy. We will do even greater things than he did. His spirit is on us to preach and set free the captives.

On top of all of that I have a great team of people helping me launch, "the mix," our career ministry. God is doing great things in our city. I can't wait to see lives changed. Lets do this!

ICE CREAM

Today I was at Chick-Fila with my brother. I was wondering if people who hate God don't like to eat there. The whole time you are there, shout to the Lord is playing on repeat, the people who work there call you sir four hundred times and everyone is pretty clean cut. I'll have to admit that if I worshiped Satan I would still eat those tasty christian sandwiches. I still wondered how it made people feel. As I was standing in line this autistic kid was staring at his ice cream with passion and slowly licking his ice cream like it was from a scene of a dirty movie. Something mesmerized me about this little kid. I watched him with a big grin for about a minute. I think his mom even laughed at him because he was so in the moment. I mean, there could have been a nuclear blast ending life as we know it, and this kid would have been content. It reminded me about sweetness of life. I want to lick my ice cream cone and make people feel uncomfortable. I like how the least always teaches us what life is really about. I guess the last really is first.

Thank you

At times over the past couple years I've been so down and hurt. There was a time when it was hard to wake up, and even imagine finding joy again. I was in counseling today and tears where streaming down my face because of the gratitude of every person who sewed into me over the past couple of years. Those people are, Chad and Connie Runge, Brit and Nick Johnson, My mom and Dad, my Bro Quinn and Tara, John Stockman, Noah and Corrie Fletcher, Rodney Taylor, Johnathan Jones, Chance Craven, Jordan Bogart, Ryan Shelley, Dave Harder, and Dr. Greg. This is just a few of the people who were in the trenches with me, and today I was so overwhelmed by looking back on God's love pouring out of these people. Audra has been the most significant of them all. We met at a time when I was pretty angry still, and she just had a call from God to stick it out and love me through. I've experienced so much healing its exciting, and over the break we were able to celebrate victory. God came through! He always does. I'm engaged to an amazing woman who loves me like I never knew possible. April 9th will be about celebrating Gods faithfulness. He won it for us, and all you are apart of his plan to see that happen. We will celebrate together Gods amazing love and faithfulness! This is your victory too! Thank you for loving me and being a part of the story.

Update

Whats up friends?! Here is the latest juice on what happening recently. Its been a pretty busy month. We have been fixing drywall holes, painting, and moving into the house the we are starting our community in! The house was an old house that the church used for high school ministry, so it needed a little tlc. Today we have six more cans of paint coming in, and well be ready to move in next week! We haven't moved in yet, and God is beginning to people into our path that need our help. It's pretty exciting to me that God would trust us with people. There will be more on this in the future, but for now we will leave it at that. It's been a couple of years being back here in Jax, and God has been faithful to bring people alongside of us that Audra and I really connect with. Its so great to have good friends again that we can share life with. That has been an answer to prayer for us. Great relationships don't happen over night, and its been hard to leave such a great network of friends into a place where I have had to start over, but God is so good to make things right..always. He never lets me down no matter how bad I doubt. God is so good in the details of life. It really been a process of letting go of control that has been so freeing. That is it for now. Big news coming up...get ready.