Hello! This has taken way longer than I expected to update. I recently starting taking a full time class schedule which has sucked all my free time dry. The blog unfortunately is the last on my priority list, but here we go!
A little back story to you that didn't hear about this, or maybe you just sort of stumbled on the page. A year ago last Jan. my wife left me. It was a nasty ordeal, not one of the best times in my life. This is not a time I would wish on anyone, or desire to go back to. On the other hand it amazingly brought me closer, and revealed so much about what I really believe about God. I came to understand that I had a little picture of God, and how he loves me. It's been a crazy ride, and I've found him more that I ever fathomed.
The first thing that I began to understand is that I am a crappy savior. I've never been in a position before where I was 100 percent dependent on God. I mean I have said I was, but was I really? Most of what I did was working really hard and asking God to bless it. So for the first time, I was screwed with out God. It was so painful not having any hope. I had no hope because I knew I couldn't do anything about my broken heart, my broken dreams, and my depression. Finally, for the first time in a long time, I needed a Savior.
In America, we can get whatever we want when we want it. Do you want a better body? You can just buy one. You want a car? You can buy it and pay for it later. Do you have depression? You can take some meds and that will take care of it. The point is we don't really have to wait on much. I think this has spilled over into the way we view salvation. When I started to look at Jobs life I saw his restoration was very different from the idea of American salvation. If you recall, Job's entire family, career, and health was wiped away from him. Despite all of the tragedy he still hangs in there and serves God. Right after the account of Job's misfortune, the writer explains that he is restored seven times what he had. Really, casually I might add. When we read it, which I've been guilty of, we say, "Oh God made everything good, in an instant." Nothing could be farther from the truth. Correct me if I'm wrong but it usually takes around nine months to have a child. So if he had ten children, it would have taken him at least 9 years, assuming one of the times he had twins. The rest could be said about the rest of his life. His animals had to breed. His home had to be rebuilt, his heart had to heal. For Job and everyone else, healing is a process.
My whole point is, that restoration doesn't happen over night. The more you rush it, the slower it is, and the more broken you are. If your believing God for a miracle, keep holding on, and find the little things. He is the mundane everyday battle of you waking up, and being diligent to work through your process with him. Its slower and faster for everyone, and the only one that decides that is him, and how you respond to his leading. If you rush it, your saying your a better savior than him. Answer this question for me, what is it that you have ever saved?
